Submit to the WTF File / Advertising Abroad

Let me start off with the case in point today and let you draw some of your own conclusions first prior to me supplying you with my very own spinning slant on this accursed thing.

For your viewing pleasure…

This was submitted by a friend that is currently in Paris. I know, i should be asking her about the cars being torched by the local muslim youths, their president and his current proposal of increasing the work week from 36 to 40 hours a week, etc., but instead we talk about nice things like how Parisians shit in the street in broad daylight and how the place generally blows… but I digress. I am here today to talk to you about this absolute travesty of an ad for a drink called Orangina. This drink is obviously orange flavored (no shit! Really?) and according to my ability to creatively translate any language that I come across”… contains pulp”, or little chunks of vitamin C goodness floating around in it’s own juices. I actually had something like this when I was in the Mid East called “rain” that was quite good….

…BUT IT DIDN’T HAVE A PIC OF A MOSTLY NUDE MAN-BEAR WEARING A LEAF, A LA ADAM OF ADAM AND EVE FAME, LICKING IT’S LIPS, WINKING, WHILE HOLDING A BOTTLE OF ORANGE JUICE OUT LIKE A SCHLONG AND SHITTING AN ICE CUBE. 

To add to that: he also looks like he is submerged in a pool of urine.

-And I bet the damned thing has rabies.

I really have no idea what message this thing is trying to get across. Is this the favored drink of fucking were-bears or something? I for one thought their favorite drinks consisted of deer’s blood and mulched babies, but according to this ad I am completely wrong. News flash to me is that bears even care about their citrus intake at all, seeing as how the scientific world has them listed as primarily CARNIVORES that occasionally suppliment their diets with roots and fungi, NOT ORANGES. How does he even open the damned thing without prehensile fingers?

Fucking French and their wierd fucking ads.

Now if the bear had boobies… that would be a REAL ad.

 

~ by Old Iron on May 15, 2008.